she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
