porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
