some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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