Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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