that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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