she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
