They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize