I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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