He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
