How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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