She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
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