it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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