So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
