if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Come share oat with me in your robe
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
