the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Someone came in the potted fern
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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