I don't think brook has ever known best
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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