Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Randomize
