You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
