Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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