I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize