Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
