i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
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