were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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