I threw up into my coffee this morning.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
