We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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