He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize