Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
