check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
