The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
