found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
this will be a night to untag.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
