I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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