Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
It's not a walk of shame if you run
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
