my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
