Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
