i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
