I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
love makes seman taste better
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
