im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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