I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
