if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
