We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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