i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
