i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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