Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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