If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Boobs are out for the taking
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
