ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
