All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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