You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Randomize
