NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Randomize
