No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
