am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
You dont lie about slip and slides
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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